What’s in a Year?

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I recently had a conversation with a friend who expressed a desire to stay her current age, which had me thinking, what’s in a year or what’s in an age? I once expressed such a desire but at a much younger age, I told my grandmother once that I always wanted to be 14. I remember thinking back then that you had your whole life ahead of you. At 14, life was full of so many possibilities and I just wanted to capture that moment and live in it in infinitely. Clearly I didn’t think it through, I couldn’t even drive at 14. Needless to say my comment didn’t sit particularly well with my grandmother and while I’m not sure precisely how she interpreted it, it was a sore spot for a while. Reflecting on all of this now, I don’t associate any age to my actual physical condition but really to what happened around me in life in that particular year. Not that I wouldn’t like to stop the aging process, but for instance, the age in question, was a horrible year for me, I was just graduating from law school, taking the bar exam (that’s enough to make anyone whose ever had that pleasure misery, want to forget that year of their life) and trying to find a job. Since then life’s been a lot of chaos, I have had some interesting medical maladies including being told I may never have children (clearly that’s not the case), being told I may never walk again or may never walk without some kind of aid again (I can walk though I still have occasional issues when running, this story will be a post one of these days for a little bit of back story on me and my epidural nightmare) and then had two children while commuting to work 70 miles from where I lived. While I don’t believe any of this is cosmically tied to the current age I was when those events happened, that is how I associate them:

@ 26 they told me I may not have children…

@ 27 I proved them wrong with Beautiful Baby #1 and almost never walked again….died my hair red, really bad choice.

@ 28 I got pregnant with baby number two, take that Doctor who said I may never have children, and thought oh crap what if this time I really do never walk again….got rid of bad died hair and went back to my natural color for the first time since umm high school?

@ 29 I finally got rid of that damn commute and beautiful baby #2 was born, excellent year so far, oh and finally let my natural curl take over

It’s amazing how much your year can be tied to a hair style or color. Clearly these years were far more eventful than that but that’s really the jist of it. I wouldn’t want to stay any of those ages because if there’s anything I’ve learned, at least at this age, each year still brings new and greater things. Now ask me in twenty years and I might have something different to say. You are talking to someone who fears death immeasurably, to the point it causes me small panic attacks at times. But I look forward to watching my children grow from tiny humans to hopefully wonderful, compassionate and humble adults and meanwhile this year, I will raise a glass to toast 29….again.

Come on, I didn’t say I wasn’t at least a little vain…and I am female, we never reveal our true age, at least after a certain point, which I may now be reaching.

 

 

Photo Credit: Someecards.com

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4 responses »

  1. I totally understand your logic. I have similar associations with food – chopping potatoes, eating saltines . . . It’s interesting how we link experiences or time periods to feelings and/or memories.

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